Sorry that I yelled at you.

I don't really feel like talking issues like that,
those issues that you know will hurt my feeling for sure.
Then why do you still ask???

You said you are worried about me,
about me being laughed by others,
about me being viewed as someone achieving nothing,
about me being dumped once his schooling is done,
about blah blah blah...

That every thing you mentioned,
I know wayyy much better than you.
What you are worried about worries me too.
But then what can I do???

All I can do is try my best and take it easy,
so that I won't be that depressed when something bad happens.
But I know this is not the answer you are expecting from me.

Sorry but I can't give you a positive or affirmative answer,
because I myself know no affirmative answers either.

So could you please stop probing me like that???
Me at this time is more fragile than ever.
And I just want to be taken by destiny.
Whoever gives me jobs I will just take it.

Still, I thank you for probing me like that.
Through this I know how fragile I am,
and how much I need to release something negative,
also how coward I am--simply choosing not to face or talk about it.
But guess what will come will come ultimately, right?!
Like the phone call ended up so wrong...

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C'est la Vie

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